Montana?

So, at least I'm trying. At least I'm blogging again. It might not be very frequent but hey, I'm a very busy man. Not really actually. My afternoons are full of ESPN, playing football with Sean and Paul and thoughts, key word thoughts, about doing my homework. So, I guess I could write more.

Just like this past summer, I here the road calling my name again. This time, there are a few more possey members. Actually, they're all coming. Shortly after I finish mowing the Shay's lawn, I will hop in the car with three of my closest friends, Sean, Paul and Matt, and push for the North. Destination, Bozeman Montana.

I love Montana. I'm not really sure why. It's slow there. Not bad slow, but a calming slow. A slow that reminds you that life doesn't have to be hectic. I get to take a break when I'm out there. Be in a new place. I get to leave school and whatever back home. That's always a wonderful feeling.

I'm exciting to see my brother. I don't know why I always have a good time when I go up to visit him. Maybe I like him because he's in Montana or maybe I like Montana because Montana has him. I don't know but I can't remember ever regretting going up there. I'm super stoked and can't stop thinking about it. I think it's essential to take a break and let God calm your heart and clear your mind. I think that it's important to do it alone, true, but I also think that fellowship with people close to you is important too.

Hope you have a good week end.

to Friday

I'm Creative Writing class. I'm not a big fan of it. We are critiquing each others work. I'm not a big fan of that. I just took a physics test last block and have a calculus test next. I'm not a big fan of those. I didn't eat breakfast and I'm feeling quite hungry. I'm not a big fan of this. Today is Friday. Huge fan.

Today is the day that all things troublesome are beckoned to be temporarily disposed of. Sharply at 12:35 today, my world shifts, for that instant represents liberation. Liberation from the duties that await me Monday through Friday. But toady, oh today, my worries melt and my passions are revealed. I know that today, it's okay to be whatever I want. There are no expectations. None, until Monday, when the eternal cycle of Monday through Friday begins again. And then I will wait for Friday.

So here's to it; here's to Friday, here's to the agony of the week already over with and to the agony awaiting us next week. But most of all, here's to you and I enjoying our Friday.

Shady's back..back agian

Wow...I'm writing a post. I haven't done that in a long time. I'm trying to get back into the gist of things. School has been on for three weeks and I'm now just getting the hang of it again. Maybe that's a bad thing. I mean, this whole summer I went out and just experienced life. Every opportunity I got to go and do something, I did. I didn't let myself get into a routine. And I think that I learned a lot from that. My teachers are beginning to tell me that I need to start planning for my future because without planning it now, it will never become anything good. I disagree because how can we know what we are suppose to for our lives now. I didn't know what I was doing the next week, even next day my whole summer and I experienced everything to the fullest. I wasn't ever looking forward, worrying about what's next and that lead me to live in the now. And I think that because of that I was able to listen to God more clearly. My life wasn't cluttered with the future or routine or planning, It was just the now, the here. I don't want to waste away my senior year in high school, a huge year full of opportunities, trying to figure out what my life is going to look like next year. So, I'm not. I'm going to live here and now, and trust that my life will be just as exciting next year.

I'm not really sure who still reads my blog. Maybe my brother, my proverbial brother and a few others on occasion. It makes me wonder if I should even start blogging again. But then I got this funny feeling that maybe I should get a Mysapce, and realized how much I actually hate them and need to start blogging again so that I don't fall into the dreaded hell hole that is Myspace. That's probably a little over done, but You get what I'm trying to say now, right?

i miss my bed

I think that I have only slept in my own bed about eleven times so far this summer. The count isn't suppose to get to much higher in the near future either. I've gone to New Zealand for two weeks, backpacking for a few days, to Mississippi for ten days and tomorrow I'm going to Portland, Oregon for another ten days. It's a glorious thing.

I gave it some thought. I spend so much time at home during the school year, that I really don't want to during the summer. So I planned trip after trip, trying to not be at home as much as I can. Not that home is boring or anything, oh wait yeah it is.

I'm going to be a senior next year. The thought of being eighteen, nearly out of the house and going to college soon, kind of really freaks me out. It made me start thinking about my childhood. I just hope that I didn't miss anything. I hope that I got all that I could fit into these years and it really does scare me that I may not have. I'm starting to realize that high school is almost over. The time in my life that I thought would last forever, didn't seem that long.

Though I can tell you one thing. I can't even begin to describe the gratitude I have for the friends who are in my life. The blessings that all of them have given me are enormous and have made me into who I am today. They're the reason that I don't want high school to be over with. They're the reason why I hope I didn't miss out on anything during my high school years. Have you ever had on of those serenity moments. When all your friends are together, laughing, enjoying each others company. Rob Bell describes it well when he says that in those moments, it seems that no matter what happens to you, or what will happen to you, everything will be alright. It's a moment of sheer joy, and pure happiness. I love those moments, and its only with a close group of friends like mine that you can have those. I'm excited for what is out there for me. For what my future holds and for what God has to show me. I just don't want to get to caught up in the future. I want to enjoy now.

i suck at titling

I couldn't fall asleep last night for some reason. I was dead tired, but really excited because my bed was so comfortable and I hadn't slept in it for ten days. I think that excitement kept me awake. Any who, I wrote this poem while lying in my bed. I don't write a lot of poetry. Really only when I'm inspired but I really liked this one so I thought that I would share.

Oh yeah, and I don't really write down any of my poems. Actually, this will be the first. I usually just memorize them, until I'm write new ones. So I don't know how to really use stanzas or punctuation properly. Sorry about that.

Between the trees and the ground,
lies a heart that beats to the rhythm of a grown man,
driven to passion,
bypassing eloquence with standardized authenticity,
telling itself that its broken and it will break again,
and people will stand by in awe,
because you can't tell them why,

Near the edge lies a heart,
that beats to the pace of the wind,
blowing it to the left, to the right,
and to the left again,
fallow, unscathed,
it cuts with the grain,

In my mind there beats a heart,
Like the fire that rages inside of it,
faster and faster until it distorts,
into something miraculous,
something of design,
of purpose and truth,

I wish I held a heart like that,
yet mine lies under a tree near the edge,
until I have faith in it,
Like he does,
then it will beat again

i guess i forgot to title this one

I'm sitting right now. Tom Safilian is sitting right next to me. Chris Nicoletti is wandering right behind us. I'm in the Queenstown Lodge. It's like YMCA of the Rockies, but in Queenstown, New Zealand.

My legs are on fire. We went on a hike, well a little walk as they would say in the NZ, up to the Mueller Hut. It's a 400,000 dollar hut in a complete alpine mountain terrain. three feet of snow sorround it, avalanches sound in the distance and I lay in my sleeping bag in a tin hut. It's was pretty bomb. The best part was coming down--well for a while at least. Since the snow was so dense we, meaning Tom, Chris and I, were able to sprint down decently steep snow fields, without fear of injury.

Tom just reminded me that we are only going to be here for nine more days. Not enough, I tell you, not enough.

I'm on a time limit because I have to pay for the internet. Tom paid for it so you can thank him for this post. But nonetheless, I can't give proper explination of the trip becasue, well I could write about it for quite some time. So when I return to the States, God forbid the day, I will tell you all about it. Only if you want to hear.

God has taught me something on this trip. There's always something more important.

what is fire...

While sitting, memorized by our achievement, Paul, Matt and I enjoyed a behemoth fire during my last night in the states for two weeks. The question arose, "What is fire?"

My answer: "Maybe it's an energy wave that is visible to the human eye, like light waves. We can't see sound waves, gamma rays or such, but maybe we can see light waves and "fire waves"."

Paul's answer: "I don't know. I have more paper to burn."

Matt's answer: "Fire is the absence of no fire."

Indeed my good friend, indeed.

Oh and one more thing, why don't I get a June 6th. I feel jacked. I leave at 5:00 tuesday evening, and arrive in New Zealand at 8:00 thursday morning. What the hell happened to June 6th?